Saturday, February 13, 2010

4 Months

As of yesterday, my little one is four months. And oh my heavens does she melt my heart!

I hadn't realized it's been two whole months since I've shared my feelings here and so much has happened. We are officially on the foreclosure list at our bank - and yet they still keep calling asking if we would be interested in tryitheir modification program - idiots.

We decided on Thursday that we will file bankruptcy. It is not a proud moment, but on Wednesday our free babysitting disappeared. It wasn't her fault, but it totally caught me off guard and I freaked a little. Day care will cost us a minimum of $200 a month, more than likely closer to $300 - $350.

I am working - but it's not enough and I need more. That breaks my heart too, more time away from Emily. But it needs to be done. We are meeting with a woman today to look at renting her house. We wanted to wait until they kicked us out, but it sounds like a deal we cannot pass up. If she is willing to do what she says, we will have an amazing house that we can stay in for a very long time at a VERY reasonable amount.

Our marriage is amazingly strong, stronger I believe because we have figured out how to weather the storms together. Rowing together instead of in opposite directions. God has done amazing things in the past few months and we are truly learning to rely on him.

My daughter is growing and learning and every day is a joy - even when she doesn't sleep for more than an hour at a time - all day and night. Hopefully this is a phase. A short phase.

Here are some recent pics of my Emily. She has three tooth buds (which would probably explain the permawake baby) and still dealing with some gas issues (now on soy formula - disgust!). She is the light of my life and it amazes me everyday that she is ours. Our daughter. Forever.

We are dedicating her on the 28th and her adoption should be finalized by the end of May. We are a family and it feels good.
These pictures are from christmas, and forgive the disguise on my husband - he doesn't want his image on the internet. Cops are paranoid!