Word Vomit Part I (is anyone else as disgusted by that word as I am?)

So much has happened in the last few weeks and my brain has shut down. I dont' know how to write about it all, it's rather overwhelming. But it shouldn't be. This is the first since we started trying to have a kid that things have been, well, easy. And now I choose to freeze. Go figure.

Our first home study was May 5th. Almost two whole weeks ago and I haven't even thought of writing about it. I suppose it was due to the overload the garage sale created, but dude. Two weeks? Without a single desire to post? Whatever is holding me back from posting about this stuff is also keeping me from writing our birthparent letter.

The first meeting went great. We meet with E down in Phx and we did our family trees. Just back to grandparents and only aunts/uncles who were influential in our lives. Thank goodness, because I have 12 aunts and uncles and I can't even count how many cousins I have. Ooooh - I just counted and I have 29 first cousins, some I haven't seen since I was in junior high so I don't think they really count. Can you imagine doing a family tree with all those people? Luckily Mr. Sparky's was really easy - his family is kind of...different.

After we drew our trees and labled the people we had to discuss our relationships with each person and their relationships with the other people on our tree. It was really interesting because we could see patterns, good and bad, and we discussed which ones we would keep and what we would do differently. For instance, I have a lot of alcoholism on my side of the family, in fact most of my cousins have been through rehab, some several times. And Mr. Sparky's mom is an alcoholic (even if she doesn't think so, she is).

E asked us how we combat that and it was pretty simple - Mr. Sparky doesn't drink, period. I may have a drink if we go out somewhere really really special, but it has to be really really special. And we don't keep alcohol in the house. When my parents come up they always bring beer and wine. And I will drink some of their beer and wine. They usually leave the wine because it isn't really smart to travel with an open container here in the great state of Arizona (or anywhere for that matter). And you know what? I usually end up throwing out the blessed wine a month later. And it always makes me sad.

So that took two hours and then we went to BRU and bought weird things like a car seat and other essential things we cannot live without the first week home with a baby. Because this whole thing we're doing apparently ends in a baby. Who knew. Now, I'm not sure what I'm about to say is good or bad but each trip to the baby store gets a little less stressfull, a little less angsty. We know the layout know fairly well and can easily run in and out in less than 15 minutes to buy what we need. Each time we make a trip to Phx we are now stopping there, picking up essentials a little bit at a time. We really go for the daipers because you cannot buy the kind we want in bulk here in Podunk. And those diapers are so soft and snuggly and smell so absolutley wonderful! It's hard to imagine that we will be responsible for a being that is THAT SMALL.

I just erased two whole paragraphs full of interesting and stimulating tidbits, but this was turning into a novel so it will have to wait until next time. It took me two hours to write this. I really need to quit work so I can blog.