April

April is a beautiful month. Here we are guaranteed at least one more snow fall (probably not this year though as we've only had 1/2" so far), the birds come back in full force, the trees start to bloom again and it's warm out. It's also Mr. Sparky's birthday and tax season! At least one of those things I always look forward to.

April is also the month that our future (possible) daughter will be born.

Yeah, I'll let that sink in for a little while, I'm still trying to absorb it myself.

It is a remote possibility that Mr. Sparky and I will be parents in April. Yesterday I found out that my friend's brother's girl friend (yes I know it sounds like one of those stories, but it's true. I know my friend personally) has decided that she really doesn't want this baby. And we all of a sudden have been thrown into some pretty scary and exciting stuff.

As I said before, this is a remote possibility with the chance that she will keep the baby. There are so many factors at play right now. She might not even be legally able to keep the baby. She has a son (who is just a little under or over a year), and she and her mother have both been charged with child abuse. The little boy apparently fell off the couch while the grandmother was watching him so they went to the hospital. There they found many, many old fractures. It makes me sick to think that someone could do this to a little baby. But anyway.

This has to be a God thing. Only he knows whether or not this is our little baby. So many things have to happen before, well, before anything can happen. We haven't even filled out the application for our agency yet, we need to start the home study, the classes, etc. The really good thing about this (besides the whole baby thing) is that the fees are drastically lower with this route. We're looking at about $4500. Which compared to the $25,000 we were facing before, it looks like pocket change. Except our pockets are no where near that deep. So we get to see God really go to work. And we get to trust him, completely.

Prayer is what we need to wrap this situation in. Things have to happen, money has to be found. And I'm pretty sure the dogs have killed the money tree we planted last year in the back yard, so that option is out. We do not want to ask my MIL for the money, but if that is where we need to go, we will. Please pray for the baby's health - the mom is smoking and we are not too sure what else she is doing. Please pray that I can keep my wits about me and not get all tangled up in the thought that we might be parents in a few months. Gotta tell you, that nine month adjustment period looks mighty fine about now, but we'll manage. I've had 28 years to get adjusted to the idea of being a mom.

Mr. Sparky is 100% behind this. I wasn't sure he would be, but when I told him, he didn't even think about it, he just said yes. So, we've got a place for the little to sleep, we've got a car seat and stroller that we can borrow. All we really need are some diapers, formula, bottles and clothes. And some serious patience and prayer. Like I said, so many things have to happen first. We're not even sure she is going to give up the baby. But the dad really doesn't want to be a single dad, and his parents don't want to raise a baby, my friend would adopt her, but she doesn't want the weirdness. This way, at least the baby could be raised around her aunt and family. We wouldn't keep her from them. I don't' know. So many thoughts. I don't even think this sounds too rational. I'll keep you posted. But please, please pray.