I've been sick. Sick, sick, sick. Today is the first day I have seen the outside. Or anything that isn't my couch. And I still feel like death warmed over. Maybe a little mushy too.
I hate Qwest and I'm not afraid to say it. Since we live in a "rural" area, Qwest is the only phone provider (unless you want digital phone or whatever it's called). So they have a nice little monopoly in the area. Which means we can't do squat. Every time it rains our phone line goes out. Which means no internet either since we are still living in the dark ages and have dial-up. Well, in case you haven't noticed (or live outside of AZ and don't really care, totally understandable) we have been getting pounded the last few days. So we have been without a phone since Thursday. It came back on this morning.
This has happened before and we scheduled a service call. Of course the phone started working again so we cancelled the call. Silly, silly people. This time they couldn't come out to see us until Saturday. And not the Saturday in January, no. The Saturday in February. And we are keeping the appointment because dammit, I'm tired of this happening.
Also I'm sick. Did I mention that? My goodness I haven't been this sick in a long time. And it's not like it's yucky sick (you know the type - both "ends" sick). I ache and am light headed and dizzy and tired. Oh so very tired. I was going to go to work yesterday but after taking a shower I decided I needed a nap. I was THAT tired. Not a good sign. So I didn't go into work. And I probably could have justifiably stayed home today, but I don't think I could handle another day on the couch watching television. And I LOVE TV. But we don't have cable and what's the point if I can only watch Judge Judy (have you seen Judge Alex?? I swear they only hired him because he looks like Ken. Even his hair is perfect!) and Montel. Sheesh.
On a lighter note - Mr. Sparky and I have decided that if the whole April baby thing doesn't work out we are taking the year off. No more OPK's, no more doing it because we have to, no more adoption talk. I'm burnt out. I want sex to be fun again. The way it was before it became a chore, before it was just to procreate.
It's not that we are going to prevent it. By no means are we going to do that. Just no more meds and no more dr's and yeah, no more stress. I already feel ten pounds lighter (and I've gained 3 thank you very much). So it is a good thing that we're taking a break. I miss my husband and I want to work on our relationship and have fun and do things and enjoy ourselves and get our finances on track.
I know I will miss peeing on a stick 4 to 7 days a month. I will, because it's been the routine for the last 2.5 years. But I will not miss feeling pressured to have sex or the anxiety the end of the cycle brings. Hello FREEDOM!